consent series


forget the bad sex
i want to read the good
the genderless space

they made art with snakes
took a break from installing
to meet me
drink tea

them sweetly smiling
“can i kiss you?” I asked them
and then we are

in that moment first
when your insides cross fingers
the inhale

lips on collar bone
the length of them along you
move from couch to stand

“you’re so tall”
“do you want to go in here?”
move to the bedroom

slow for seconds
sneak kisses between giggles
feeling deep sweet shy

check in again now
hand sweeps nearing that soft spot
where pants meet stomach

inhale deep soft kiss
hard exhale you think of snakes
of hands on the wheel

on you
shed clothing
“i really like you arms” flex
feel stronger here now

fall into laughter
in this bed
neither of us
will sleep in for long

slow quiet kiss now
“what do you want to do?” smile




my first time was good.
when i say this to women
they are often shocked

we are taught instead
it should hurt
that it’s breaking
something inside you

not taught our pleasure
only shame
turn the lights off
normal is for him

did you get him off
wait through long pounding hours
or just a minutes

taught to hold our breath
stare at how many ceilings
to-do list in mind

my first time was good
the consensual first time
the one that i count

he smelled so damn good
had softest high thread count sheets
made crepes when we woke

i stayed the night.

and isn’t that what we need?
radical balance

i wish that for you
a revolution of sex
for every human

softest sheets and crepes
or rose petals and candles
tender exploring

whatever you like
maybe punk rock and the floor
if both of you want

creating the world
together how you want it
co-write the story





the other first time
her name whispers on my tongue
taste sweet green apples

she walked in the room
in my memory it’s like
she was sent to me

a gift for my truth
that feels admitted right then
i like women

when i say a gift
don’t get me wrong here, okay?
a gift of learning

a gift in our way
not consuming capital
i don’t want to own

she walked in the room
and it was clear to me then
my other first time

desire is so sweet
when you don’t seek to own her
only make her smile

we tangled ourselves
into the web we knew then
starbucks and late nights

dancing clean
at the recovery club
driving in my car

turning it up loud
she had tattoos everywhere
and then she kissed me

we were on the floor
“sleeping” over at a friends
“watching” a movie

that other first time
the Godfather our soundtrack
hard film our soft light

remember the way
she melted into you there
you were so damn scared

and yet each small ask
“is this alright?” met with yes
you kissed each tattoo

taste sweet green apples
held each other giggling
became lovers then

while the godfather
played on
you learned about you

she taught many things
but the one that sticks with you
is how it all felt

that other first time
green apple



last night in the car
you checked in on my feelings
such care and concern

i thought about
toxicity in language
of that word “friendzone”

i know how men feel
guess what? i’ve been “rejected”
not just their problem

but in those moments
ive learned to take what is mine
hold my own feelings

honour yours truly
when you tell me what you need
listen and hear you

we can’t just seek yes
convincing ourselves worthy
only through your eyes

we decide
without really knowing
already “the one”

last night in the car
you checked in on my feelings
and i was honest

you here in my life
brings this magic
this grounding
there’s a new strength here

quiet flirtations
give me fields of butterflies
you are incredible

you teach me to see
the world through your careful lens
glimpses of beauty

you point out to me
things i rush past too quickly
you slow me right down

last night in the car
when i checked my own feelings
i told you the truth

everything we share
all the beauty you can give
you as you are here

are enough
and you deserve above all
your autonomy

so if i ask you
like i did
if there’s more here
and you say no

then my friend thank you
for what you give is enough
remove the pressure

im only here for
what you choose to give freely
grateful for friendzone

since it’s where we are
both comfortable
where we
mutually find


poems originally posted on Smokii Sumac’s Facebook page January 16-19, 2018.

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